Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
