even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
