marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Randomize
