it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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