She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
