I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
