Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
