god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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