i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
