ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
