if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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