Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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