The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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