So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
