my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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