I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
