You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
