loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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