I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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