Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
