then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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