i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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