It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
