Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
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