Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
