didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
