At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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