i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize