I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
