I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
