i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
