I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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