sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
How drunk are you?
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