I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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