Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
