you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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