I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
