It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
