good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Randomize
