another moral hangover. fuck.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
