i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
17 year olds will be the death of me.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
