when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
