Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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