Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i was born a porn star she said
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
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