Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
