ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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