so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
