if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
