So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
