how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
